In my previous post about The Gardener, I ended things off by mentioning that I’ve been experiencing something new and exciting lately that I haven’t tried for a very long time. Truth be told, I think long-term singles go through a repetitive cycle that looks something like this:
- Go on dates with the purpose of finding someone special
- Find someone special
- Date for just long enough for shit to hit the fan
- Stop seeing said person
- Find yourself on the rebound, sleeping around with multiple people
- Start feeling lonely again, repeat steps 1 through 6
Only there is another level of singledom that only us long term singletons know about. Another world that the serial relationship types never get to experience…
You see, I’ve been single for 3.5 years now, and even though I’ve had a few attempts at relationships in between, I wouldn’t consider it to be a real-deal relationship until the word “love” is thrown into the mix. The last person that I was genuinely in love with was Baby Daddy, and even though we’re no longer together, he’s one man that I’ve been with who I will always continue to love. I’ve just never made it to that level with anyone that I’ve dated since, which has molded me into a long term singleton. Which means that I’ve reached that next mysterious level, where suddenly you realize that you’ve become so damn comfortable with being single, that you actually prefer it. Yes… you have learned to appreciate being single, with all of the glorious perks that it offers, and it would take one hell of a person to convince you to change.
Here’s one of the best parts about being a long term singleton: you take the time to build your tribe (aka. your people) by finding friends that you can lean on like a family, and vice versa. You literally create a world for yourself where you are so loved and supported by your friends, that the empty void of loneliness gets smaller and smaller the longer that you go. And now, you have essentially groomed yourself to be able to find sexual relationships that do not need to fulfill you emotionally as well. Don’t get me wrong, it’s highly important to connect with the people that you date or sleep with, but it becomes possible to remain independent while doing so.
This pretty much describes where I’ve been at in my life these days. I’m feeling like everything in my life has come to a place of calm, and I’m just enjoying the serenity without any intention to break the surface of the water. Then again, I’m still super fucking horny.
So what’s a girl to do when all she wants is someone to touch, kiss, lick and play with, without needing to worry about the future? As it turns out, this wasn’t a question that I needed to ask myself. The answer fell into my lap one day, and suddenly the pieces of the puzzle fit together perfectly…
The Vagina Chronicles Volume 50: Romeo and Juliet
It was a week day evening when I was hanging out at home minding my own business like I usually do, when suddenly I got an email from an online personals site. I’m going to be honest – I’m one of those people who will just delete emails without even reading them, unless something truly jumps out at me. I probably respond to only 1 out of every 15-20 emails, mostly because I just get bored of the same old “5’10, 175lbs, 7 in cock with 2in girth, lots of stamina and can play all night, know how to make you cum over and over again, so get at me” response. Guys, listen up: if the most exciting part about you is your physical stats, then you’ve got bigger problems in life, and I really mean that. I know it’s hard to talk about yourself, but if you want to catch the girl, you might need to show a little character and charisma. Or maybe that’s just me, and maybe all these stat monkeys are actually getting laid, who knows!
In any case, I opened up my email and was pleasantly surprised by the words jumping out on the page. The email was from a man who explained that he had been intrigued by my words, and he wondered if I would be interested in chatting with him and his partner, who were looking for an ongoing connection with another woman. Attached was a cropped photo of the two of them together, both smiling warmly at the camera.
I sat back for a moment and truly considered whether or not I should respond to his message. On one hand, I usually deleted emails from couples right away, dismissing the idea as being something that I got out of my system in my younger years. On the other hand, there was something about his words that appealed to me, and I suddenly found myself wanting to know more about them. And soon, I found myself responding to one email after another, until phone numbers were exchanged and a group chat between the three of us was formed. And that was how I met Romeo and Juliet.
Romeo and Juliet are a couple in their 40’s, who met each other a few years ago, and discovered a whole different level of love. If you ever met them, you would know what I mean when I say that these two have discovered something deeply deeply special with one another. It’s the way that they interact with each other, and the way that they keep it so real. Juliet describes herself as a raging bisexual, who loves the dominant side of herself that comes out when she’s playing with another woman. Romeo loves Juliet to the core of his being, and watching her experience pleasure with somebody else is incredibly erotic for him. Together, they have a full life with their family and extracurricular activities, but feel that there is just one small thing missing in their life: a bisexual woman whom they can both connect with and play with, with the hopes that the attraction will be mutual between all three.
Now, the last time that I was involved with a couple, it was Jack and Jill when I was living in Germany over a decade ago. Therefore, my experience when it comes to joining a relationship is quite limited, which makes me feel like I’m young and innocent all over again (it’s actually kind of hot), while simultaneously terrified. The relationship that I had with Jack and Jill was wild and amazing, no doubt, but it certainly came with it’s own set of challenges. The biggest challenge that I think anyone entering into a polyamorous situation needs to be very aware of is imminent jealousy. It would be almost impossible to share your partner with another person, and not feel some level of fear for the relationship that you have with each other. Usually this rears it’s ugly head in the form of jealousy, which puts the three of you into a situation where you have two choices: work it out or don’t.
While chatting with Romeo and Juliet, I learned that they were looking for something that was only going to become sexual while both of them are present. I agreed that this was a good boundary to have, as I knew from previous experience that things can get complicated when three separate relationships are growing at once. And because of where I’m at in my life, with my comfort in remaining a solo agent, I knew that it would be easy enough to look at them as one person, and to keep things in that perspective. So the next thing you know, we made plans for the three of us to meet with the intention to chat and get to know each other.
The first time that I met them was nerve racking to say the least. We had been doing so much chatting and exchanging steamy photos and words, that I felt like I already knew them, but it was also going to be the moment of truth. You really never know if the connection is going to be there unless you can feel it when you’re around each other physically. I wondered if they would both still think I was hot after meeting me in person. Take note that when you’re the outsider joining a couple for a potential threesome, it can be intimidating knowing that you need to win over two people instead of just one! But you should know by now that I was up for the challenge.
I’ll never forget the way that I felt when I walked into their apartment building, stepping into the elevator and pushing the button that would take me up to their floor. There was a small part of me that wondered if I should turn around and forget the whole thing – what if this was one big mistake? But I was far too curious to turn around now, and I was pretty sure that it wouldn’t be as scary as I thought it would be. This was the most nervous I had been for a “date” since I was a teenager, and I would be lying if I didn’t admit that I was excited to feel those old familiar feelings. Who knew that I still had it in me! And then the elevator came to a stop at their floor, and I made my way through the hallway, to the suite number that was theirs.
Juliet met me at the door, greeting me with a warm hug, telling me how excited she was to finally meet me in person. Damn Juliet… she’s so unbelievably sexy, and a thousand times more in person than over messenger. She’s the kind of woman who is really at ease in her own skin, and it shows. Behind her was Romeo, stepping forward to meet me with a shyness that was both endearing and attractive – it confirmed some things about him that I thought I already knew. He’s the kind of man who is very gentle and respectful of women, and would be cognizant of how I felt in that moment. It was immediately apparent that he cared about making me feel comfortable, which put me at ease.
After the little tour of their space and a bit of nervous chatter, we found ourselves sitting on the floor, chatting about so many different topics that had yet to come up. They explained that they love each other deeply and they consider themselves to be life long soul mates. I told them more about myself and my thoughts/beliefs on relationships and sex. And as I’m sure you all know, it doesn’t take long to assess the kind of connection that you have with another person. You either feel it or you don’t, and usually your own level of curiosity towards them is a pretty good indicator of how things are going. In this case, I felt like I could have sat on the floor and chatted with them for hours, but alas… our time was limited that evening.
When I hugged each of them goodbye and walked down the hallway back into the elevator, I couldn’t help but feel elated. Now that I had met these two sexy creatures in person, I knew for certain that this was a road I was very willing to go down.
Fast forward to exactly one week later, when I had plans to meet with Romeo and Juliet once more. Throughout the week, the naughty messages and photos remained as hot as ever, building my desire to touch and taste the likes of Romeo and Juliet. I had explained to them before our meeting that if anyone was going to make a first move tonight – it needed to be them. I was so afraid of accidentally making the wrong move on the wrong person at the wrong time, and causing damage to their relationship. Because they were so connected with one another, I knew that if I left the ball in their court, the first move would only be made once they were both 100% on board. This is all new territory that we’re exploring, and you can never be too careful.
They greeted me warmly at the door and welcomed me into the living room. A large blanket was on the floor with the fireplace going, and again I found myself at ease almost instantly. The three of us sat on the floor together, chatting about our days, when they asked me if I would like my feet massaged. I’ll be honest – it sort of took me by surprise and also made me feel a little nervous. There I was with both of them totally focused on me, and it was slightly overwhelming to feel like the object of desire for both people. But then, they instinctively turned to each other, and started making out in front of me instead. Immediately, I felt the heat rise within me as I watched them kiss each other deeply, watching their bodies respond to each other. In short, it was so fucking hot.
When they broke apart, Juliet came in closer to me, her beautiful ocean eyes full of desire from her passionate kiss with Romeo. And suddenly I could stand it no more, and in the next moment our lips were meeting and my hands were running along her body. Her soft, beautiful amazing body that I had been fantasizing about for weeks. Right in that moment, it dawned on me that I had been an absolute fool for only dating men for god only knows how long. There is something so luscious about a woman that just can’t be compared to anything. Sorry Guys, but you know it’s true! Once she and I broke apart, I beckoned Romeo to come to me, and in a moment his lips were on mine and the taste of him sent a shock through my body as I felt my panties get a little wet. The three of us came together on the blanket and began to hold each other, caressing each other’s arms, legs, feet and faces, all while taking turns making out. I could have sat there for hours doing just that, and I would have felt satisfied. Watching the two of them touch and kiss each other was a major turn on for me. The pure pleasure in their eyes, combined with their obvious familiarity.. very erotic.
We decided to lay down on the blanket together, each of us taking turns being in the middle. When it was Romeo’s turn in the middle, Juliet and I shared a devious smile with each other while we kissed him and teased him, pulling up his shirt and playing with his nipples. She reached down and stroked his cock a few times through his pants, and we watched as he became more and more aroused, taking turns touching and kissing us both. I love watching a man who is totally in the pleasure zone, especially when you can tell that he’s just living the dream. I mean, he’s already scored a woman like Juliet, so life is pretty good for him, but now he had two beautiful women making out in front of him, making out with him, and teasing his most sensitive spots. Juliet climbed on top of him, staring into his eyes and kissing him slowly and deeply. Again, I felt the burning desire within me flare up while I watched them together. For a moment, I imagined how hot it would be to watch them rip off each other’s pants and start fucking, but I knew that there was no way of that happening without me having sex with them both right there and then. And for now, we were keeping things pretty PG-13.
When it was Juliet’s turn in the middle, Romeo and I lifted up her shirt and began playing with her nipples, licking and sucking on them while caressing her body. I reached down and wrapped my arm around her thigh, running my fingers along places that I knew would get her hormones racing while I trailed my tongue along her nipple. Romeo so badly wanted to pull her pants off and show me her incredibly beautiful pussy, but we agreed that we didn’t have enough time to start taking each other’s pants off. I knew that if I was going to have a full blown night of sex with those two, I was going to need 3 hours minimum from start to finish. Possibly more. But we just didn’t have enough time that night, so making out and touching was going to have to be enough.
In between make out sessions, we would pause and snuggle up with each other, chatting, laughing and sharing stories. The clock was coming down to the wire, and we all knew that our time would be up soon, so with me in the middle, we laid on the blanket together in one big tight snuggle, while I felt Romeo grinding his cock against my butt. Juliet and I were making out when she asked if there was some humping action going on back there, to which I replied that I thought he was going to pee on my leg soon, and we all busted out laughing.
The night came to a close, and I kissed them both goodbye, making my way to the elevator with what probably looked like a stupid goofy smile on my face. Just like the last time that I had left them, I felt elated, only this time it was so much more powerful. I knew that I had just experienced something really special with them, and the fact that it only went so far really added to the whole experience. The older that I get, the more I realize the value in getting to know people on a deeper level before having sex. The build up is fun, for one thing, but also when you meet the kind of people that you can truly be yourself with, you can express yourself in a way that’s so much more free. I’m not sure if or when the three of us will actually have sex, but I know that if it does happen, it will be a fun and respectful experience since the ground work has already started being laid.
I know I’ve said this before, but it’s worth saying again: it is completely possible to have both casual and ethical sex simultaneously. Just because you like to get your freak on, it doesn’t mean that you can’t care about your partners. In fact, the best kind of casual sex is the kind where everyone keeps the communication extremely open and honest the whole time. What really destroys sexual relationships the most is unmet expectations that were never explained or discussed. I know you’ve all been there too!
The bottom line is, I’m not sure where this sexy little threesome situation will take me, but I’m excited to go along for the ride with these two. They’re both fun to talk to, sexy as hell, and amazing for each other. That, and the visual of them making out with each other mere inches away from my face is burned into my mind, and it’s impossible to avoid getting turned on by the thought of it.
Until next time…